All a Girl Needs: Tissues, Ice Cream, and The Cap
by Chiron's Arrow
Summary: Darcy gets by with a little help from her iPod, some ice cream and her friends. Who said that breaking up is hard to do?  Shuffle30 challenge. Prompt: "Pistol Packing Mama" by Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters


**Summary:** Darcy gets by with a little help from her iPod, some ice cream and her friends. Who said that breaking up is hard to do? Shuffle30 challenge. Prompt: "Pistol Packing Mama" by Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters

Steve cocked his head, the tinny strains of music faintly brushing his ears. Something about the tune stirred a memory…was that Bing Crosby? He contemplated his beer, and tried to decide whether it was worth the effort to get up from the kitchen table – he might be damn nigh invincible, but that didn't mean that he didn't feel the hits. There was a slight change in the air pressure as the air handlers switched off and in the silence the song became clearer and he found himself singing along.

_ Oh, I'll sing you every night Bing  
>And I'll woo you every day<br>I'll be your regular mama  
>And I'll put that gun away<em>

_ Oh, lay that pistol down, babe_  
><em> Lay that pistol down<em>  
><em> Pistol packing mama<em>  
><em> Lay that thing down before it goes off and hurts somebody<em>

He smiled broadly to himself, who would be playing Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters at what… he glanced at the clock… three in the morning? Well, nothing else for it, he shrugged and stood up, feeling like the ninety year old man he was, grabbed another brew and wandered out of the kitchen, searching for the source of the music.

A few turns later he arrived at one of the many little hidden nooks of Stark Tower. The lights were down and a panoramic view of New York spread out before him; a soft glow caught his eye and drew his attention to the side, and he turned to see Darcy Lewis slumped on the davenport tucked into a corner her head in her hands as she stared out into the night. A quick glance showed the source of the music; Darcy's iPod was plugged into a speaker stand on a small occasional table, a box of tissues and an empty tub of ice cream nearly crowding it out on the small space.

Steve may not have had a whole lot of experience with women, but even he recognized the signs – Darcy's latest romance had hit the proverbial skids. Again. What was it with that girl and the ex-boyfriends? With a soft sigh he stepped into the room and slid onto the couch next to the girl. Setting the beers on the floor he reached over and dragged the girl to his side, tucking her firmly under his arm.

She barely started, just sighed and turned to bury her face into his chest. "Eight million people in the city of New York…why do I always pick the assholes?" she muttered softly into his shirt.

Steve chuckled, surprised by the dry tone and relative lack of tears. "You and Titman broke it off, then?"

Darcy snorted "Friends should stop friends when they are dating someone named Titman." She sat up and scrubbed at her face giving him a wobbly smile "What brings you here?"

"I heard music."

"Ah." Darcy nodded with mock wisdom, "Bing Crosby."

Steve hummed in response, picked up his beer and took a long pull. "Not what I expected to hear at three in the morning here."

"What! There's nothing wrong with Bing Crosby. Although I will admit that I usually prefer Glen Miller. But tonight called for something different."

"Why not Miller?"

"I'm already depressed, dude, and I really don't want deal with the whole MIA thing."

"Oh?" he paused and the implications sank in "Damn."

Darcy looked up at him "Great, now we're both depressed."

Steve made a helpless little gesture 'Nah, I've decided I can't be depressed about that kind of stuff anymore. I have to move on, make a life here and now."

Darcy nodded "Makes sense." She snagged his beer out of his hand and took a sip. "Ugh, what's with the crap beer, Steve?"

"Deserve what ya get, grabby."

"Well, I'm done being depressed over it too." She waved her hand vaguely at the table and the empty tub of ice cream and tissue box "At least… I'm broken up with so often I've got it down to a science."

"Is it wrong that I find that disturbing?"

Darcy chuckled and sat up "Seriously, I have my breaking up playlist: I cry, I sing along, I eat my ice cream, and I blow my nose a lot. Then after two hours of feeling sorry for myself I put on my strong and pissed girl playlist and I'm done with that jerk."

"Now I am definitely disturbed. Shouldn't you be a bit more upset when you break up with someone?"

"Honestly?" Darcy sat up and tucked herself into the corner of the couch a small smile playing across her face "Ask me when I date someone who's not an asshole. Some days I think I'd be better off if I'd date Loki – at least I know he's a sociopathic asshole from the get go"

Steve shuddered and tried to formulate a reply to that frankly disturbing thought.

"Besides, how many guys have I dated since we met?"

Steve stiffened slightly "You seem to… get around…" he returned cautiously.

"Well, that was diplomatic."

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean…"

"Yes you did." Darcy interrupts with small, dark smile. "It's okay. I know what they say."

"Oh."

"Really, that is the problem, you know?" She caught Steve's sideways glance and shrugged "Expectations."

"I'm sorry?"

"Everyone thinks, Darcy Lewis; flighty party girl. Always up for a good time…"

"You do have that reputation…undeserved, now that I stop and think on it."

Darcy sighed and sank back into the couch her gaze on the distant lights outside the window. "Well, apparently you're the only one who does! Think about it that is." She continued, an absent note in her voice "Why the Hell don't I date you?"

Steve froze and Darcy laughed "Just kidding, Steve!"

He relaxed and smiled at the vivacious girl sitting next to him "That's good. For a minute there you had me worried…"

"Ugh, no! It would be like dating my brother… you know; if I had one."

Steve laughed and reached out and ruffled the girl's long hair.

"Oh my God! You jerk, you're going to make it all knotty!" Darcy laughed and dragged her fingers through her long dark hair, attempting to smooth it. "I swear it takes me hours to iron the curls into submission, I do not need your help!" Darcy reached out and fiddled with her iPod, switching to another playlist, one that was quieter and featured less angry female voices, Steve found himself relaxing almost unconsciously in the darkness with a good friend and a bottle of beer.

"At least you don't expect me to put out."

Steve just managed not to spit out his beer at her words. "Darcy, that is an appalling thing to say!"

"What!" Darcy's voice sounded innocent, but then she burst into laughter. "It's true, you're one of the only ones who doesn't expect me to spread em just 'cause we've spent a little time together."

Steve sat up and stared at the pretty girl next to him on the couch "You mean, Titman?"

"And Smith, and Gonzalez, and Tomlinson, and most of the rest. Yep." Darcy chuckled, but it sounded a little wet. "I think the only ones who didn't break up with me because I wouldn't sleep with them are Vail and Chein. And Vail married a guy two weeks later so I'm not sure that counts."

Steve was quiet for a moment "Even Barton?" he eventually asked, his voice a little gruff.

"Oh please, he still thinks I'll eventually give it up to him." Darcy scoffed.

The man next to her frowned "Does Coulson know?"

"No way! It's not like he's harassing me or anything. It's just a vibe, ya know? He comes back from missions all hot and bothered and gives me a smoldering look and a nod."

"Something should be done about that – you're supposed to be colleagues, Darcy…"

She interrupted "We are. He'd just like a more…collegial atmosphere. Plus, I don't want to go running to my boss because I can't handle my ex-boyfriends." Darcy paused and glared at her friend "Oh my god! Don't you dare give him a talking to…or something ridiculous like that!"

Don't worry, I won't" Darcy sighed in relief at his calm tone. "I'll just tell Natasha."

Darcy's jaw dropped and she stared at the sober man next to her, speechless. A moment later he flashed a quick smile and she burst out laughing.

"That's just evil" she whispered.

Steve shrugged and grinned back, "I'm learning."


End file.
